Feb 18
A Problem; A Calling?
So, I got my first issue of TIME magazine today. I flipped through, read a few articles, and stopped when I saw a list of articles about religion and its healing powers. The firs article was a guy who asked a reverend, a doctor (radiology and psychiatry), and another doctor (psychiatry) about faith and whether science should delve into it. I read it more closely than I had with the prior articles. I don’t know why, but it really REALLY made me think. I decided after half of the article that I wanted to learn more about my own faith (Christianity, if you didn’t know. I think I’m Presbyterian, but not entirely sure yet). And so, here goes the very long thought process I went through.
Firstly, I have been thinking a lot recently about God: I want to become a better Christian. I haven’t been going to church while up here at UW. Actually, I just realized I missed this Christian gathering I said I would go to. Ugh. I need to put these things in my phone… Anyways, yeah, I recently read a blog entry by one of my friends about what she thought about faith, God, and the different ways to get closer and finding God. She said something about Einstein and how God let him discover things that He had made in the world, and how she thinks her path to God is through math. That was a SUPER paraphrase. Anyways, that got me thinking about what my path to God is. I am not the best at math, and I am the first to admit that. Heck, I’m not even good at math. I just sort of get by. but my own path to God… I think I know what it is. I am pretty good at the theological perspective of the Bible. I’m decent at taking a part of Scripture and analyzing what God wants us to take from it. You know, like a pastor. I think I might want to be a pastor.
But there is a slight… Well, HUGE, problem. UW does not offer majors or minors in Christianity, history of, theology of, or anything of Christianity. They have classes, for sure, but nothing at the end of it. Another problem is my intended major, Computer Engineering. I still want to pursue this. Would it be a good idea to take classes on Christianity while taking such hard classes for my major? Would it be wiser to switch to a different major that could possibly help me on my path to God? I was thinking about becoming some sort of English major. For the ability to construct my thoughts well and organize them onto paper. Initially, I thought I could do this and work for like CollegeHumor (Which is like a site that does funny videos and articles. Link is in my recommended sites list). But now that I think about it, a pastor needs relatively good English skills to organize a sermon.
This is probably a good time for a short history of my life and family. I was raised a Christian by my mother, grandmother, and grandfather. My grandparents are very religious, but my mom didn’t have time to be very involved in church. She had two children, very limited income (my father left when I was about 5 years old), and we went to a church kind of far away so my grandparents could be around other Koreans. I didn’t take church very seriously back then. I was a child and wanted to be with my mother all the time (very much a mama’s boy). Even as I got older, church didn’t have a high priority to me. Instead of my mom, I hung out with other kids. We worked at getting prizes in the youth group (we had this weird system of ‘do good things and you get a token. Spend your tokens on prizes!). For a while, though, we stopped going to church. But then my stepdad came along. He was a pastor and deacon at a church. He was actually my inspiration to become a better Christian. Since I have known him, I have grown much closer to God, taken church quite a bit more seriously. I learned more about the Bible in the few years that I’ve known him than most people learn in their entire lives. I think I partially want to become a pastor because of him. Wow that was way longer than I thought it would be.
Back on track. The solution to my answer is actually simple: Go get my major in CE, don’t bother with the English major because ENGLISH IS MY FREAKING PRIMARY LANGUAGE, and take those classes about Christianity. With God by my side, I can take any amount of schoolwork. Did I just solve my problem? Probably, but I’m still going to give it some thought. If I am to take this path, I will need to go to school for 5, maybe even 6 years. My grades first quarter were so bad I need to put my but in gear and work A LOT harder. I’ll get guidance from counselors, my dad, and I’ll pray quite a bit. Hopefully in the end I’ll get what I want and get rolling on that path to God I’ve been talking about. And while I’m talking about that, I do wonder how I can connect my major with my religion. Can I do something with Computer Engineering that will complement faith? I mean, I plan on going into smaller hardware like iPods and Gameboys. What can I do to make that religious? More thought required…
In conclusion! I’m going to ask God for a sign that will help me decide, or a push in the right direction. This whole free will thing sucks when all I want to do is get closer to God. I’d give that up if He would just tell me what to do. So I’ll be waiting for that sign. If it never comes, I’ll just go with the plan I made. Pray for me, for I will definitely need it.
